Destroy distractions before they destroy you!

foucs.jpegDestroying a distraction is one of the hardest things to do. Temptation creeps at you like a thief in the night and leaves you more vulnerable than when you fell for it. The Master Deceiver lets you believe that the distraction is actually a much needed hiatus from what you were focused on. Oftentimes when you’re nearing a breakthrough, your patience and passion waivers, your energy levels are dramatically reduced and your relationship with God may be put asunder – this becomes the perfect opportunity for a distraction to present itself.

Sometimes you don’t even have to be in that space. You may have a vision, broken down into goals and just before you kick off the first step, a distraction comes along that keeps you in your comfort zone for longer than planned, stalls your movement, wastes your time and sometimes redirects you to an unrelated path as opposed to your desired destination.

Distractions are like drugs. You don’t recognize their power at first and you seem to have things in control. Like all things new (sometimes not so new – as it may be a relapse), it seems fun, pleasurable, addictive and brings some sort of release/relief; it starts growing on you.

Next thing you realize how much time has gone by, how little you have achieved and then put yourself under stress and duress for not realizing it sooner.

Don’t be too hard on yourself.

Find an accountability partner who checks on your progress and well-being. Find a mature mentor with a broad view on life. This will aid you in keeping focused and also encourage you to carry on and move on. Also, have Cheesecake – it tends to pick me up when I feel drained.

But most importantly, pray. You will feel lighter from within and ready to go AGAIN.

The day I start my magazine…

Researching the magazine and media landscape made me realize that investors and advertising are the lifeline of it – as with any business venture. As much as that may be a challenge to overcome, it still won’t hinder me from creating and publishing my own. Every great plan or dream comes with a plethora of tests, but beginning with the goal in mind pushes one to reach the finish line.

“You are your deepest desire. As is your desire so is your intention. As is your intention so is your will. As is your will so is your deed”.

Watching the below video  reminded me of the value and substance I want to continuously celebrate and record one day.  My desire is for women to feel fearless, beautiful and needed after going through the pages. I want them to eagerly anticipate the next issue, have their boundaries pushed and  paradigms shifted.  I’d like many others to contribute just to show how everything is possible and permissible. I want my magazine to be a community effort, soulful relief and source of quality information.

I’m just putting it out there. The Lord knows the desires of my heart.  Can’t wait until it happens.

#Womandla

Sick of my dreams

I threw up everywhere. All over the floor, all over my bed. I was gasping for air and feeling completely overwhelmed. I’m sure I was having some sort of psychosomatic disorder, all brought on by my dreams.

Yes my dreams. They were not nightmares at all. They were too many, a plethora of active dreams keeping me awake, giving me night sweats and the worst kind of anxiety.

I’ve been feeling bereaved and lost for the longest time.

What on earth am I here for? Seriously, why do I wake up every single day? What difference am I making, what goal am I conquering, what view am I shaping?

Life cannot be about paying bills.

girl staring in fire

The pressure is insurmountable. The burden of having to tick my bucket list items is going to make me burst. Actually, I am bubbling right now.

Of course my family doesn’t understand. They keep telling me to wait it out, to see if something comes up, they want me to wait for tomorrow. The very same tomorrow that may never come. That tomorrow that is not promised. So I must wait for uncertainty, instead of paving my own life, dreams and meeting opportunity as I go along. They mean well, I know that. But I can’t wait. I can’t eat, I can’t sleep. I can’t- anything.

I am plagued by the vastness of my dreams. My mind is everywhere. Then there is this security lie that I am at war with. These man-made boundaries and industries making one feel enclosed and sheltered. They’re just money-making psychological structures. Ploys to keep you at bay. Not even the security I pay for, completely covers me. Why then are there terms and conditions?

Let me pray.

“BE STILL AND KNOW THAT I AM GOD! I WILL NEVER LEAVE YOU NOR FORSAKE YOU”

Ahhhh, and then I hear a clear, recognizable and soothing voice in my spirit! Peace. Thank you for visiting me. I have missed you.

I slept well for the first time in a long time. I slept knowing I can do it all if I just pace myself.

I woke up and quit my job.

A prayer to push…

Disturb us, Lord, when
We are too well pleased with ourselves,

When our dreams have come true

Because we have dreamed too little,

When we arrived safely

Because we sailed too close to the shore.
Disturb us, Lord, when
With the abundance of things we possess

We have lost our thirst

For the waters of life;

Having fallen in love with life,

We have ceased to dream of eternity

And in our efforts to build a new earth,

We have allowed our vision

Of the new Heaven to dim.
Disturb us, Lord, to dare more boldly,
To venture on wider seas

Where storms will show your mastery;

Where losing sight of land,

We shall find the stars.
We ask You to push back
The horizons of our hopes;

And to push into the future

In strength, courage, hope, and love.

The 11th hour- God is never late

God goes before us every step of the way. Half of the time we spend doubting and being anxious is all for nothing because everything always works out in the end.

God is never late.

We always want to rush to the end and completely forget about the journey that leads us there. Imagine a book that reads.. “Once upon a time, the end.” How well would this book sell? How interesting is a life built of short sentences with no plots, storylines or anticlimaxes? How would you encourage others who will follow your footsteps or look up to you if everything seemed perfect? You would be empty. No substance therefore no influence.

I experienced this lesson, at the end of 2014, after a year of unhappiness and turmoil. In my mind things should have been a lot different because I have always done things right, asking very little of anyone and achieved everything in record time.

See, I am pedantic by nature. I love knowing things in advance and planning accordingly. I do this when shopping. I plan where I will park. I map out the mall in my head. I expect things to run smoothly especially because my plan B has a plan B.

I WILL spam your inbox and call register, just to make sure we’re still on track with plans. It works well for my career but not so much for relationships and life in general.

To be honest it’s tedious, but it’s ME.

After my big life plan bombed out on me, I was left in the same place as the previous year. I was very despondent to everything. I dragged my feet, I woke up late, I had resigned from things internally for a while.

If it wasn’t for people around me who often reaffirmed things that I had in my heart, told me about my potential and seeking God truly, I wouldn’t be where I am right now.

My life took a big turn of events after months of trying and it was like a surge of energy rushed through my body and reawakened me. Everything that was of the best happened in 2 weeks. I knew God had everything to do with it, because all my pre-planning would have had loop holes and missing links.

But I had hope. I prayed fervently and continuously. I spoke and invited great things and most importantly, I believed.

Ephesians 3: 20 says “Now to Him who is able to do far more abundantly beyond all that we ask, think or imagine, according to the power that works within us be all glory.”

This morning, I said, I was in love with my life again and I have God to thank.

To me it seemed like He came through for me on the 11th hour, but to Him it was just on time. His plan made more sense and was less strenuous.

Trust the process, He is the author of time and master strategist. I am expectant of more and excited to accelerate!

The arduous conflict between OPPORTUNITIES and CAREER

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I’m at a crossroads.

As a young fledgling, with one foot still in varsity and the other in industry, there’s no doubt about the career path I have chosen.

I see myself growing in almost all disciplines that it has to offer as I can’t seem to select one that I particularly favour or one I would want to do for the rest of my life.

So I sit here and wait for the not so obvious things, like world peace and the world to change, and wonder what to do with my mundane yet full of potential life.

Coming from a family of professional students, there is still a yearning to study further and continue this predictive path of preluded success.

Success, such a loaded word.

I wonder if this word includes happiness, growth, and peace in it or is it truly JUST the money, acclaim, fame and loneliness that everyone so charmingly packages.

I want to make my family proud, earn a reasonably decent paycheck, and climb a corporate ladder that will hopefully cushion my fear of heights. I also want to cruise in a beautiful depreciating asset and salivate over ridiculously expensive shoes, buy garish and gaudy garments that make me look like I’ve made it.

I’m attracted to the idea of opulence.

I look at my vision board that scorns the aforementioned dreams and substitutes my qualifications with facilitating women, wanderlust, retail and music. This board seemingly resembles the lives of the Real Housewives. Well sort of.

I am waiting for a sign.

I might just be afforded an opportunity to disconcert the dawn of my career and mission into a vacuum; be sucked in by the vast world and its forgotten secrets and pleasures.

How exciting!

I don’t know if I would be fulfilled though. Should I take the risk of being a dissident and do the unthinkable? What if my career catches up with me and results in me finding my purpose? What if it never does?

A qualified nomad is not what my mother sweated for.

Doesn’t it all work out in the end?

Sigh.

I need a life compass.